BRITTLE HAT – Straw hat Care
The most useful bit of straw hat care advice is for taking your straw hat out of winter storage. It’s handy anytime during the year too, if you feel your hat getting extra crispy (like McD’s fries). If you squeeze your straw hat and it feels too stiff or brittle, it’s time to freshen up.
Bring your hat in the bathroom and turn on a hot shower. The steam from the bath will rehydrate the straw, bringing it back to life and giving it that brand new flexibility all over again. It’s like magic (but real). But make sure to not literally put it in the shower. Just place it on the counter and let that steam roar.
SWEAT – STRAW HAT CARE
You’ve just spent over a hundred dollars on a premium Panama hat, and now you’re about to sweat in it. The last thing you want are stains ruining that gorgeous straw. Yet the main reason for wearing a straw hat is because it’s hot outside. The problem with being hot is you sweat like a monkey.
If you regularly perspire, or know you’re traveling to a super-hot desert (Vegas), we recommend using a panty liner inside the hat. Cut the absorbent material into strips and place under the hat liner. Your sweat soaking problems will be magically whisked away (like fake Vegas magic). If the thought of sticking your nose down the women’s hygiene aisle grosses you out, you can always spring for some paper towels. They’ll work just as well – and can be bought at Home Depot (manly grunting sound).
RAIN – STRAW HAT CARE
Avoid rain like the plague. That’s it. Don’t get your straw hat wet.
The straw will swell, then bend and distort like that weird-looking dude in The Goonies. You’re going to have to get it reblocked by a professional, and that means $$$. You can try to fix it on your own, but it’ll never look quite right ever again. Just don’t do it.
If you’re heading out and see a famous Miami monsoon blasting your way, tuck that baby into your shirt or jacket. Being a real hat aficionado, you’ll take your bumps and bruises like the rest of us, and get ridiculously soaked for no reason – all for the name of hats.